How do you feel about money?
Do you love it?
Do you want more of it?
Do you hate it?
Are you scared of it?
Do you feel like you can never have enough of it?
Maybe you’ve felt all of these things around money. That’s ok, these are very common feelings. I’ve definitely felt all of them, sometimes all at once.
Money is a complex topic because a lot of us have been raised not to speak about money. We were raised in a culture where it is impolite or even taboo to talk about our earnings or our investments (even more so if you are a woman). The only time it seems acceptable to talk about money is to complain about not having enough of it, or how evil it can make some people.
But when it comes right down to it, money is nothing more than a tool. A tool that can be used to help you achieve the things you want in life. If we treat money as more of a form of energy rather than a reward or commodity, we can reframe the way we think and feel about it.
Because it’s not money that makes people evil or greedy; it’s the pursuit of it and the fallacy that more money = more happiness.
Think about money as a vehicle to help us get to where we want to go rather than the destination. When we think of money as a means to an end, we can reframe our motives for money.
So how exactly can you reframe your thoughts and change your relationship with money?
Well, I’m still learning every day and it is a constant battle to overcome my scarcity mindset.. Having said that, these three tips have really helped improve my relationship with money and helped me let go of the stress and anxiety that money holds over my life and my happiness:
Ps. I’m not a financial advisor so please don’t confuse this with advice from someone who is educated in finance. Please see my disclaimer for more information.
1. Listen to your internal dialogue
This is the most important step. Start paying attention to how you talk and think about money. Are you constantly complaining about how you never have enough money? Do you secretly resent people who have money? Do you think money [or lack thereof] is the cause of all of your problems?
If you are having these thoughts around money, you might be unconsciously repelling it. Lack attracts more lack.
So instead of wishing for more money, rewrite the script in your head and think about all of the amazing things you already have in your life. Think and speak like you already have everything you could ever want. Constantly tell yourself these things over and over again until you believe it. Because what you focus on, you create more of.
Once you can truly be happy where you are with what you have, only then can you create an abundant mindset. When you stop focusing on what you don’t have, you create space for appreciation. And when you act from a place of gratitude, your dreams and desires come from a need to grow and make the world a better place rather than to acquire more. When you live and act with an abundant mindset, the universe (or whatever higher power you believe in) will be there for you with the tools you need. Because abundance attracts more abundance.
2. Pay attention to where your money is going
Ok, if we are being honest here, I am very guilty of not doing this. I have a hard time tracking my spending. So give yourself some grace if you’ve never tracked your spending – you’re not alone.
But that doesn’t mean this point isn’t important. In fact, if you track where your income is going each month, you might be blown away by what little changes can help you save. Knowledge is power!
If you’re not in a place where you can save just yet, knowing where your money is going and knowing that you have enough to cover the bills each month can go a long way to offset your anxiety.
And the more you pay attention to your money, the more you can learn about it and help it grow (like anything in life).
3. Consider giving ~10% of your income
Now, this will only work if:
- you are able to do number 2 first and
- you are in a position to afford to tithe a percentage of your income
It might sound counterintuitive to give your money away to feel more secure, but it really works.
Giving to causes that mean a lot to you will not only allow you to attract more money (because it’s abundant, remember), you’ll also feel better and happier being able to contribute to a cause greater than yourself.
As with anything in life, in order to get, you must be first willing to give.
If you’re able to do these three things, you can change your relationship with money. Your love-hate relationship doesn’t have to stay the way it is, it can get better and it starts with paying more attention to it.
Although these three steps are simple, that doesn’t mean they’re easy. Remember that we’ve been taught for years that money is scarce, a limited resource and that it’s not for sharing.
But the reality is, there is new money being printed every day. There is an abundance of money and countless opportunities to make money all around us.
If we can change our thoughts around money and think of it as energy rather than a commodity, we can allow it to flow to us and through us freely and endlessly.
I hope this article will help you feel better around money. Remember, this is going to take hard work every day. But the more you do it, the easier thinking with an abundant mindset will become..
Until next time,