I wasn’t sure if I wanted to write this as a blog post but here I go.
Lately I have been feeling a little helpless. I have a deep desire to want to help people change to improve their life, their health and their happiness.
You see, a few years ago I fell into personal development and since then I have never been happier or felt more at ease in my own life. I fell in love with continuing to better myself and I didn’t understand why more people weren’t adopting the trend.
I went through phases and still go through them where I want to help people see that they can help themselves. The answers are all right in front of them, they just have to pick up the tools.
But it’s not that easy.
People don’t like to be told what to do (I’m sure I didn’t have to tell you that lol); they need to discover it on their own as did I with personal development and probably a number of other things in my life.
Yet, I still had to learn the hard way that telling people what they need and even why they need it almost never ends up with them adopting your suggestion.
Leading by example can definitely motivate others to hop on the train with you, but it doesn’t always work either.
You see, people have to change for themselves. You cannot persuade, nag, threaten or fight your way to change someone. A desire to change can only come from within.
And typically that desire is sparked by hitting something big; needing to overcome something you’ve never encountered before or don’t have the tools for – something you need help with.
Unfortunately, this is the case a lot of the times when people experience a loss of control; like having a near-death experience, being diagnosed with a terminal illness or in my case, facing infertility.
However, some of the most challenging experiences we face have the power to spark the best changes in our lives. They have the ability to teach us lessons we wouldn’t have been able to see before. They can show us a better life, a different life.
I wish I could say this was the case for everyone but, unfortunately, sometimes it isn’t.
Sometimes people continue to live never seeing the light because there is comfort in familiarity, even if that comfort is self-destructive.
And it doesn’t matter what you say or do, or how many fear-based tactics or incentives you use, nothing can ever change someone until they want to change themselves.
So instead, let’s focus on how we can adapt our own habits to improve our circumstances. Let’s focus on what we can do to create an environment or conditions that support change. Let’s focus on what actions are going to serve us and the people around us best.
Because at the end of the day, the only thing you can control is your own actions.
All you can do for others is:
- Lead by example.
- Let go, but be there for them.
- And pray that one day they will ask you for help. And pray that it won’t be too late.
Sending you so much love today.